Is Jesus Sitting on the Throne?
December 5, 2023
Imagine that you’re comfortably positioned in a small kayak or innertube, relaxing and floating down a river, sunlight bouncing off the cool water. You abruptly sit up when you hear the soft roar of rushing water. A short way down the river, you see that the rapids quicken and become rough. Unprepared and caught off-guard, you find yourself thrown out of your floating device, fighting to keep your head above the water. Frantically looking for anything to help you from drowning, you grab onto a log that is an arm's length away. The log keeps you afloat, allows you to catch your breath, and gets you through the rest of the dangerous waters. As you make your way to shore, you find yourself not being able to let go of the log to get yourself the rest of the way to safety. The tight grip on the log keeps you stuck in the river, keeping you from living your life. What once served a purpose in keeping your head above rough waters, now was keeping you trapped, no longer serving any benefit.
This image is often used in treating eating disorders. With eating disorders, the disordered behaviors are used to cope with deeper hurt, trauma, or difficult situations, though they’re not healthy even when serving this purpose. They become habitual and addicting, quickening the downward spiral that can be fatal. In my own eating disorder treatment, I learned that the struggle with food and my body was just surface level to what was truly going on in my mind and life.
I remember thinking, in the beginning of my healing journey, that recovery would never be possible for me. I couldn’t see food ever being anything but the enemy. I couldn’t see myself ever finding peace with eating, a necessity to survival. I write this with tears of joy and gratitude because I’m currently living so many answered prayers. Though I still battle the eating disorder lies and urges at times, I’ve learned that part of recovery is facing the fear and acting out of victory anyways, knowing that Jesus died for my freedom. Even though I logically knew that there was something going on deep down that was revealing itself through the eating disorder, repressed hurt and believing tangled lies, every fiber of my being thought that food was the problem. I now know I wanted to think that in an attempt to keep ignoring the real pains and problems.
The struggle never had anything to do with the food. It was always about who or what I had on the throne.
“...there was a throne in Heaven and Someone was seated on it. The One seated there had the appearance of jasper and carnelian stone. A rainbow that had the appearance of an emerald surrounded the throne. Around the throne were twenty-four thrones, and on the thrones sat twenty-four elders dressed in white clothes, with golden crowns on their heads. Flashes of lightning and rumblings and peals of thunder came from the throne. Seven fiery torches were burning before the throne, which are the seven spirits of God. Something like a sea of glass, similar to crystal, was also before the throne. Four living creatures covered with eyes in front and in back were around the throne on each side. The first living creature was like a lion; the second living creature was like an ox; the third living creature had a face like a man; and the fourth living creature was like a flying eagle. Each of the four living creatures had six wings; they were covered with eyes around and inside. Day and night they never stop, saying, ‘Holy, holy, holy, Lord God, the Almighty, who was, who is, and who is to come.’ Whenever the living creatures give glory, honor, and thanks to the One seated on the throne, the One who lives forever and ever, the twenty-four elders fall down before the One seated on the throne and worship the One who lives forever and ever. They cast their crowns before the throne and say, ‘Our Lord and God, You are worthy to receive glory and honor and power, because You have created all things, and by Your will they exist and were created’” (Revelation 4:2-11, emphasis mine).
“For this reason God highly exalted Him and gave Him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow– in Heaven and on earth and under the earth– and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father” (Philippians 2:9-11).
Jesus is on the throne. He reigns with love, power, grace, and sovereignty. And if the elders surrounding His throne, worshiping Jesus face-to-face, cannot say anything but “holy, holy, holy” in the presence of the King, how much more should we drop to our knees in worship on earth? If the citizens of Heaven cast their crowns before His throne, how much more should we, receiving His mercy, forgiveness, and guidance every single day despite our sin, cast everything we have before the feet of Jesus?
The Word of God tells us that there will come a day that every knee will bow at the name of Jesus. He will forever be on His throne, whether you have Him there in your life right now or not. If Jesus is not on the throne of your life, who or what is? If you are not answering to the loving and saving grace of Jesus, who or what are you answering to? Today, when I find myself struggling more heavily with eating disorder thoughts and urges, or any lie of the enemy, I ask myself who or what is on the throne of my life. For if Jesus is in His rightful place on the throne, I’m living from a place of joy, abundance, peace, comfort, security, provision, and endless love from my Father. If I have put food on the throne, I’m living from a place of control, fear, and shame. If I have put exercise on the throne, I’m living from a place of endless pursuit for perfection, rigidity, and condemnation. If I have put my expectation of a perfect body on the throne, I’m living from a place of selfishness, insecurity, and chaos. Knowing what comes from surrendering my life, my worship, my praise, and my obedience to Jesus, why would I ever want to try to replace Him from reigning on His throne? As I have learned time and time again, the only thing that comes from filling Jesus’ seat on the throne is pain and disaster.
“I’m having the thought that eating this meal makes me unworthy to be loved unless I make up for it with excessive exercise… Who or what have I placed on Jesus’ throne that is causing me to grasp for control, peace, and comfort?” When this lie pops up in my mind, I’ve usually put the approval of man or the societal expectation to look a certain way on the throne of my life. And answering to those authorities only results in misery. Just a few years ago, I would have believed this thought and taken action in alignment with it. Today, I rebuke the enemy, put Jesus back in His rightful place as King, and it’s under His reign that I know He calls me worthy and beloved, not dependent on anything I could ever do.
My struggles never had anything to do with the food. They were always about who or what I had on the throne. In an attempt to take control when everything felt chaotic, frantic, and too far gone, I had only managed to take Jesus off of the throne. I am struck by awe and adoration when I thank Jesus for loving me enough to quite literally save my life from the throws of hell. I lift my hands to Heaven at the reality that I could never be powerful enough to permanently remove Him from His throne, the blood of Jesus covering my sin and fleshly tendency to find control, approval, security, and comfort from the world.
If Jesus is not rightfully holding authority in your life, who or what have you placed on the throne? What lies are you tirelessly scrambling to satisfy as you live to answer to the enemy? What would it look like to put Jesus back on the throne? What does He say is true about you or your circumstances? How will that change you and how you are living?
To my First Love,
You reign above it all. You reign above every heart and every mind. And in Your rightful place of loving authority and merciful sovereignty, You extend blessings upon blessings to Your people. I get to be a part of Your eternal kingdom in Heaven. Why would I ever want to live for anything else but You, getting to share the good news as I operate from all that You promise to Your children? To You be all the glory. To You be all the praise.
Amen